Review for Snake Eyes--Citrus

I find in my line of…work, there are reviews you’re excited to do, reviews that you’re not so enthused about, and then reviews that you just want to get done and over with.  The next four reviews, dealing with the Snake Eyes line, are of the third category.  So if in these reviews you find I’m not giving it my all—have mercy on me.  Don’t think I’m a bad reviewer just because I can’t for the life of me get excited about these products.  If anything, it should tell you that these are definitely drinks to avoid.

CAFFEINE CONTENT

Not listed, but estimated to be between 120 and 160 mg.

EASE IN ACQUISITION—1

I obtained these from siblings who are kind enough to keep their eyes open for energy products I have not yet reviewed; these were found at a gas station that is restricted (I believe) to Washington and northern Idaho—though I might be mistaken about the distribution.  I don’t remember the name of said gas station and at time I’m writing this review my internet is down, and by the time I get around to posting it I’ll have forgotten to look it up.  Oh well.  It’s not like you’re missing anything anyway by not knowing where to find it.

APPEARANCE/PRESENTATION—3

Cheesy as all frick.  The colors are bad (I’ve never seen a shade of green I’ve disliked so much), the cobra is as pitiful as they come (it looks like it’s smiling—now, would you honestly buy an energy drink featuring a smiling cobra), there is really nothing redeeming about it.  Only points it gets are for the bottle—I like this shape and size of bottle.

TASTE—4

This is a really, really, really syrupy Red Bull clone—the kind I strongly recommend drinking before a trip to the gym, if you really must drink it at all.  Now, Red Bull clones are tiresome enough as is; with jillions on the market why would go the extra mile in making it even more undesirable?  In all probability, the makers probably just got the generic energy flavor and combined the cheapest ingredients they could to make an energy drink—so the thick sweetness is probably more of a consequence of the store’s desire to save money than a deliberate decision with the flavor in mind (after all, this is a store-brand energy drink).  Bottom line—this is a bad-tasting drink.  Don’t drink it unless it’s a last resort.

KICK (INTENSITY)—6

Alas…now that we get to the “kick” section, its utility even in “last resort” situations is questionable at best.  At most you’re going to get a modest boost in alertness and feel somewhat less tired; you won’t even have the guilty satisfaction of a sugar rush because the sugar’s too busy making you sick to your stomach.

KICK (DURATION)—6

Lasts probably about two and a half hours, with crash to spare unless you burn the sugar off.

THE DRINK OVERALL—5.33

Well, I had more fun reviewing that than I thought I would!  I guess from time to time, it’s fun to write a really negative review, though experiencing the subject of the review really isn’t.  Bottom line: this is a bad drink in every respect of the word.  Like Red Bull clones?  Like sugary energy drinks?  Like to actually feel energized?  In any instance you can do light years better.

WEBSITE: holidaystationstores.com (I remembered to look it up)

KEYWORDS: Snake Eyes energy drink review, Red Bull clone, traditional energy drink flavor