CAFFEINE
CONTENT
Unknown but up there.
EASE
IN ACQUISITION—6
Available
(so far as I’ve been able to see) only at Fred Meyer—so I don’t see this being
to hard to get your hands on, since most people I know live within 30 miles of
the nearest location.
APPEARANCE/PRESENTATION—8
I
like that the Function Beverage company elected to take a more mature route
with their packaging job here; very often energy drinks try too hard to be
hardcore and it really drives me up the wall. This looks like something I can take seriously, something
that I can take to class or work without appearing that I’m trying to
compensate for something, something that is going to deliver a good dose of
energy but not leave me buzzing wantonly.
I think a little effort could have gone into helping it pop more, and I
would LOVE a listed caffeine content.
Few things are more annoying than when a company refuses to list their
drink’s caffeine content.
TASTE—6
This
wasn’t something that I would say was hard to drink by any stretch of the
imagination—on the contrary, I managed to sip it down just fine over the course
of five minutes. That being said,
it doesn’t really taste good—it’s
probably one of the most watery beverages I’ve tasted in a very long time, and
let me tell you that watery and citrus don’t mix.
KICK
(INTENSITY)—9
Had
the chance to try these drinks in two different situations—yesterday’s
strawberry guava flavor when I had a long day of work ahead of me, and today’s
tropical citrus flavor after a long day of work was said and done, but with a
long run and at least eight hours of needing to be awake and functioning still
ahead. You know I was pleased with
Alternative Energy’s performance in the former, and in the latter it worked
just as well—I was not wanting for energy for a solid six hours.
KICK
(DURATION)—10
I
observed the same multi-stage phenomenon as described in yesterday’s review—not
surprising, given that both drinks have the same blend. But…for the sake of you people reading
a review of Alternative Energy for the first time, the initial jolt is
tremendous, and keeps you buzzing about like a hornet for the first hour, hour
and a half or so. After the fact,
things taper off just a bit, but not enough to be detrimental; this is followed
by a brief period of slight fatigue, followed by a second, and eventually
third, wind.
THE
DRINK OVERALL—8.33
I’ll
be sticking with the strawberry guava offering just because it tastes so much
better, but if you’re down with watery citrus then you should have no problems
with this one. It kicks just as
hard and lasts just as long, and should be a gratifying experience for any
energy monger, sleepy newbie and seasoned addict alike.
WEBSITE:
functiondrinks.com
KEYWORDS:
Function Alternative Energy Tropical Citrus energy drink review
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