Sunday, December 8, 2013

Review for Tweaker--Berry




Pops up at odd gas stations from time to time.  Just keep your eyes peeled.


Even if it’s not the flashiest energy shot in the world, Tweaker is attractive and different enough from other shots to grab and keep your attention.  The main selling point in my book is the use of the tall 2 oz. bottle as opposed to the standard, squat version—sure, you still know on sight that it’s a 5 Hour Energy clone, but at least it looks different enough to make you do the double-take needed to make you stop and consider purchasing it.  Also worthy of note is the name of the shot, which I like—now, the website claims that the formula was ‘tweaked’ so many times that they started calling it “Tweaker” and the name stuck…but I’m going to call that BS; there’s no way in the world that I’m going to believe that an energy shot called “Tweaker” is not so named so because of its association with methamphetamine (also a stimulant) users.  Lastly, I’m docking a point for failure to disclose the caffeine content anywhere, either on the bottle or the Internet.


If something could be done about the gosh-awful medicinal aftertaste here this might actually have been a respectable energy shot.  The first thing that’s apparent is that this doesn’t taste like your run-of-the-mill 5 Hour Energy clone—the berry flavor is full and thick, and I was just barely beginning to appreciate it when I was hit with a barrage of medicinal aftertastes (bitter, sour…you name it, it was there), which was about as bad as I’ve ever tasted in an energy shot, and necessitated that I take it down sip by sip.  It’s not just the palate that doesn’t appreciate it, my stomach isn’t happy with me, either—it’s been about five minutes since I first downed it, and I still have a slow burn going down in my midsection.


I think the “6X The Kick!” declaration on the bottle may be a bit of an exaggeration, but at the same time it is a pretty decent shot powerwise—it took all of ten minutes before I was buzzing through my organic chemistry in record time, plenty alert and jittery enough that had a marathon house-cleaning session after I was done was in order.


The peak lasted about an hour, then decreased incrementally over the course of the next two and a half hours.  No crash, though I’m more than ready for bed.


Works really well, but it’s nasty—so it’s more or less the same as most every other shot out there.  Maybe worth the kick if you can stomach it.


KEYWORDS: Tweaker Berry energy shot review, zero carbs, zero calorie, zero sugar, diet

Tuesday, December 3, 2013

Review for Endorush--Fruit Punch Fix


420 mg


Only one place around here that sells these locally—and it’s a high-end grocery store with a reasonably good section dedicated to fitness supplements.  Seeing as I haven’t seen this sold in any other such chains, however, I’d recommend checking out supplement stores like GNC or The Vitamin Shoppe, both of which sell this in their online store.


One look at Endorush will tell you that it is not geared towards casual consumers, which tend to be attracted to things like glowing green Ms, hardcore lettering and catchphrases that become cheesy when you think about them too long.  The red bottle with the iridescent label is certainly attractive enough to grab your attention, but what holds it is the way Endorush plays it straight—everything is readily legible, attitude is kept to a minimum, and from this understatement it becomes apparent that it is a very potent beverage that deserves to be treated with serious respect.  The only thing I would change is to make the ample warning labels a bit more legible—they’re so small that with the iridescence I can hardly read them without straining.  But I suppose as explicit as they are, they’d need a bigger label for that.


This came as a surprise—I’m really not into the crap fruit punch flavor; any number of my reviews can tell you that.  This, however, is one of three fruit punch flavored beverages I’ve had recently that pulls it off.  Something about how tart it is, how much the flavor is emphasized over sweetness makes it very hard to stick to the recommended ½ bottle…which, as it turns out, is recommended for a very, very good reason.


I got cocky with Endorush.

I’m not proud to admit it—any moron could have told you that it was a bad idea to drink the whole thing at once.  I did, however, and can tell you that you had better dang well follow the serving insructions!

Last time I had a beverage this intense, it was Spike Hardcore Energy—The Original.  I was so unaccustomed to such high doses of caffeine that drinking it just about flipped my lid, and I gave it an unprecedented “OVERKILL” rating.  The entire bottle of Endorush, however, gave me such an enormous caffeine rush that I’m almost tempted to do the same thing for it—except 1) I experienced it contrary to the label’s instructions, and 2) it’s not so much the rush that tips you off, it’s how it ends that lets you know you overdid it.


Half a bottle (had the grape flavor also—review coming soon) should give you about six hours of energy.  The whole dang thing—at the very least ten.  These were ten blissful hours for me, but after it was all over, I felt like a gym towel that’s been used by hundreds of different people and washed in the hot/heavy cycle countless times over the years—worn almost threadbare.  My nerves were so frayed that when I went to bed I slept about ten hours (as opposed to my usual eight) and was so put off by the idea of further energy drinks that it was about a week before I was willing to try anything else.  As I’ve said before—stick with half the freaking bottle.


Follow the instructions, and I can assure you that Endorush won’t let you down.  It’s got an excellent flavor and a great rush suited for just about any high-endurance (i.e. physical) energy requirement.


KEYWORDS: Endorush Fruit Punch Fix energy drink review, low carb, low calorie, zero sugar
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