Review for Liquid Nitro Low Carb

CAFFEINE CONTENT

160 mg/16 oz. can—I believe.

EASE IN ACQUISITION—1

I’ve known of Liquid Nitro for a while, but I have not for the life of me been able to find it until recently, when I decided to stop by a random, out-of-the-way gas station.  Here on the Western side of the U.S., finding it’s a fluke.  Open question to readers: any of you live anywhere where it’s commonplace?

APPEARANCE/PRESENTATION—8

As with the original, I find the simplicity to convey a firm yet understated confidence that I find quite appealing—if you’re confident enough in your product that that you don’t need to shriek it out to get my attention, then I would say you’ve earned it.

TASTE—7

I had the same experience with Liquid Nitro Low Carb as I did the original in that after I opened the can, I just stood there sniffing it for a minute or so before drinking it.  The smell is complex and very appealing—Red Bull clone to be sure, but much more delicate, and almost floral.  It’s so intriguing that it’s almost a letdown to find out that it’s your run-of-the-mill Red Bull clone, maybe with a hint or two of the herbs in the proprietary blend.  It’s better than most of the Wired Red Bull clones, but at the same time falls far, far short of what the scent led me to expect.

KICK (INTENSITY)—8

At least in terms of energy, Liquid Nitro Low Carb doesn’t disappoint.  In the 16 oz. size, it provides a very satisfactory degree of energy with only marginal jitters.

KICK (DURATION)—8

The effects lasted for the better part of three and a half hours, with only enough of a worn-out feeling after the fact to make me wonder whether I was crashing.

THE DRINK OVERALL—7.67

I have to say I was a little disappointed with Liquid Nitro Low Carb—and it’s all because of that dang scent.  It’s so intriguing, but in the end, it’s coming from something so standard that it’s really quite disheartening.  That said, the herb nuances I detected in the flavor will appeal to some people, even if I found that it didn’t fit with the Red Bull clone mold.  If you can get your hand on a can, try it at least once, and let me know your thoughts—I’m sure that the resulting diversity of opinions will prove interesting.

WEBSITE: nitrobeverages.com

KEYWORDS: Liquid Nitro Low Carb energy drink review, low carb, low calorie

Review for Liquid Nitro

CAFFEINE CONTENT

80 mg/8.4 oz. can

160 mg/16 oz. can

EASE IN ACQUISITION—1

This was one of those finds I made stopping on a whim at an out-of-the-way gas station—you know, the kind that more often than not yields nothing, but occasionally turns up something I’ve never so much as heard of before.  This was the last can of the original flavor; other than that there were two really beat-up 16 oz. cans of the low carb version, plus one that was in good enough shape to add to my can collection.  Picked up both.

APPEARANCE/PRESENTATION—8

I like the simplicity of the older look; much like Red Bull conveys a silent but certain confidence that makes it very hard to ignore.  The newer one (see the pic of the big can) I like about as much, just in a different way—more in the way I like Monster’s packaging now than Red Bull’s.

TASTE—7

This is one of those flavors that I’m going to go on an on about only to say I have mixed feelings on it.  Popping the top, I took a whiff—and another, and another.  I didn’t drink it for about a minute or so because I was so busy smelling it.  It’s very intriguing—like Red Bull, but delicate and complex—things I never thought I’d say about the smell of an energy drink.  Tasting it, it’s more of a fairly standard Red Bull clone—heavier than the original enough that I wanted to dock a point.  There are some nuances of the herbal constituents of the proprietary blend (the fact that it’s made in Jamaica opens doors to all kinds of jokes there, but I will refrain…), which I liked but found to clash with the semi-cheap Red Bull clone flavor.  Some people are going to think it’s wonderful, others aren’t going to care for it at all—it’s just going to be one of those things that depends entirely upon the person.

8.4 OZ. CAN

KICK (INTENSITY)—6.5

Kick’s not bad for a shrimpy can.  It’s enough of a boost to be considered useful for less demanding energy situations, which I find I experience at least as often as the more demanding ones.

KICK (DURATION)—6.5

I got just shy of three hours here—so not shabby.

THE DRINK OVERALL—6.67

I would have seen more of a kick, but all things considered I can’t complain about the 8.4 oz. can all that much.  At the very least buying it will provide an interesting flavor experience, and I recommend that you try it for yourself if you can get it.

16 OZ. CAN

KICK (INTENSITY)—8

About the same as you’d get out of most any variety of Monster or other standard energy drink—pretty good, but I would love something that went at least a little beyond the norm.

KICK (DURATION)—8

Three and a half hours, no crash.

THE DRINK OVERALL—7.67

Not the best energy drink in the world, but not the worst, either.  Like I said, try it if you can get it, and leave your comments below.

WEBSITE: nitrobeverages.com

KEYWORDS: Liquid Nitro energy drink review, herbal energy, Jamaican energy drink

Review for Ironclad--Goji Berry

I’ve heard good things about Ironclad, so it came as a surprise when it turned up at Big Lots this last week.  For those of you who are unaware as to why I would find this paradoxical, allow me to educate you: Big Lots serves as a sort of energy drink graveyard.  While I’ve had the occasional good find there, (i.e. the highly underrated Monster Energy—Heavy Metal), it is largely stocked with drinks that range from the mediocre likes of the True Colors and Rip It lines to colossal failures like X Games Energy and Buy This Energy Drink, Help Kids—Lemon Lime.  As I did with all those, I bought both flavors of Ironclad that they were offering there and am here to report to you on the first.

CAFFEINE CONTENT

154 mg

EASE IN ACQUISITION—2

Fairly uncommon for the time being.  Not sure if that will be changing.

APPEARANCE/PRESENTATION—7

Ironclad—Goji Berry has some good things going for it in terms of packaging—I like the insignia, and I like the generally tough look of the thing, which makes it appropriate for a gym setting (this is, after all, a hydration drink).  Fact of the matter remains, however, that I don’t like bare aluminum.

TASTE—9

Popping open the can, I decided to take a whiff and see if I could ascertain what I was getting myself into.  After the first sniff, all I could think was “ah, crap”—it really didn’t smell all that good; kind of like fermented berries if anything.  Taking a sip, however, produced a very different experience, and the smell did not interfere in the least (contrast this with NX—Speed Freak or NX—Lean & Mean, which both made me feel like I was getting rotten mango pulp shoved up my nose every time I tried to drink them).  The flavor is complex—kind of a slightly earthy cranberry with less tang and a hint of cherry.  It was a light and refreshing experience; whatever the reason for its showing up at Big Lots, it’s not because of the taste.

KICK (INTENSITY)—8.5

Kick is fairly stout, considering the caffeine content.  I found it to be a solid, productiveness-promoting sort of boost, more than enough to help you get lots done around the house, and excellent for a trip to the gym for some lifting.

KICK (DURATION)—8.5

In a fashion similar to the Monster Rehab line, the peak lasted about an hour, after which there was a tapering off to a lesser energy level.  Total time amounted to somewhere south of four hours.

THE DRINK OVERALL—8.67

I hope that its appearance at Big Lots doesn’t actually spell the end for Ironclad—Goji Berry, because I frankly think it deserves a widespread clientele.  It’s refreshing and it’s effective, and I recommend it without hesitation.

WEBSITE: ironcladenergy.com

KEYWORDS: Ironclad Goji Berry energy drink review, hydration, refreshing

Review for Buy This Energy Drink, Help Kids--Lemon Lime

Buy This Energy Drink, Help Kids—Lemon Lime is a drink put out by the charity Sheetz for Kidz, with 25 cents from each sale going towards the organization’s cause.  If you want to know more, look it up.  I just want to get out there before I begin my mighty hammering of this drink.

No, I don’t have a problem with Sheetz, but I do have a problem with this drink.  It’s bad enough that if I were made a chief administrator of the organization tomorrow, I would rename it Buy This Energy Drink, Or Help Kids—make it a choice between drinking it or donating to Sheetz.  I think they’d get a lot more revenue coming in that way, at least if other’s experiences were like my own.  That out of the way, let’s get started!

CAFFEINE CONTENT

Unknown—but it’s got to be on the low end of things.

EASE IN ACQUISITION—1

This was a Big Lots acquisition.  More than many energy drinks, I think it deserves to be there.

APPEARANCE/PRESENTATION—1

This is the first of many failures when it comes to this drink.  It doesn’t even try to be appealing—just slaps the ‘name’ of the drink on the front with some truly noxious coloration.  Looking at it you can almost tell that the only reason you’d even think about buying it would be to donate indirectly to the organization.

TASTE—1

Much as I hate to admit it, my two-and-a-half year old son likes a drink called Hog Wash, which is essentially a mix of water, high-fructose corn syrup, and dye.  Most of the time when I’m out, I can convince him to drink something healthier—but sometimes he is insistent on the Hog Wash.

This drink reminds me of Hog Wash (though I think even my son would turn it down), just a conglomeration of industrial-grade chemicals made into a drink.  It is overly sweet, it is fake tasting, and it is gross.  I don’t mind Sheetz putting out an energy drink per se, but to put out a drink so bad as a compensation for donating is almost seems insulting (Ha ha!  Got you to donate!  SUCKER!!!).

KICK (INTENSITY)—5

Kick’s pretty crappy, also.  Only enough to notice, and maybe take the edge off the cravings coming from a caffeine addiction.

KICK (DURATION)—5

Lousy!

THE DRINK OVERALL—3.67

Don’t buy this energy drink, but do help kids.  If the Sheetz charity appeals to you, follow the link below; or, find another charity that you feel inclined to help out.  Donate.  Volunteer.  Do something.  But don’t buy this energy drink.

WEBSITE: http://sheetz.com/main/community/charities.cfm

KEYWORDS: Buy This Energy Drink, Help Kids energy drink review

Review for Red Rain Storm Surge

CAFFEINE CONTENT

142 mg

EASE IN ACQUISITION—6

Another Dollar Tree acquirement.  Check there.

APPEARANCE/PRESENTATION—5.5

I like that the orange of Storm Surge is flashier than the red of the original (which almost faded completely into the background on the shelves), but as a whole it’s still not all that impressive (incidentally, I still don't get the pinstripes).

TASTE—6

I wasn’t wowed by the taste here.  Passion fruit serves as the primary inspiration, though there are muddled hints of orange and maybe mango—almost like Amp (which I was not fond of either), except not nearly as sweet.  It’s the sort of thing that made me wish I had a NOS.

KICK (INTENSITY)—7

Storm Surge delivers a decent, mid-range kick—the sort you’d look for if you were tired (but not exhausted) and needed a moderate boost.  Its use is therefore limited, but plenty adequate for those circumstances.

KICK (DURATION)—7

Three hours or so passed before the caffeine wore off, after which there was a mild crash, though not a deal-breaking one.

THE DRINK OVERALL—6.67

As I said, I’ll be sticking with NOS, but if you’re looking for an inexpensive alternative to Amp, give Red Rain—Storm Surge a whirl.

WEBSITE: redrain.ca

KEYWORDS: Red Rain Storm Surge energy drink review, bargain energy drink, Dollar Tree

Review for Redline Xtreme--Lime

This is the first in a series of reviews of Redline energy drinks.  In this case, the review applies to the full bottle—which is something that won’t apply in subsequent reviews.  Read on for details.

CAFFEINE CONTENT

316 mg

EASE IN ACQUISITION—6

Finding Redline products isn’t all that difficult, but it does help if you know where to look.  I find it’s more common at specialty chains like GNC and what not more than places like gas stations and Wal-Mart, though I have seen them on occasion at both of those.

APPEARANCE/PRESENTATION—7

Not a whole lot needs to be said here—design is about as basic as they come, but—it’s recognizable as a Redline beverage.  And in this case, that’s all that really counts.

TASTE—6

When it comes to really serious energy drinks like this, taste is frequently a secondary consideration.  This is about what I expected when I cracked open the bottle and started sipping, and in some ways, that’s what I got.  The first half of the flavor experience is pleasant—it actually tastes like limeade.  The second half, however, you get a mouthful of bitter, medicinal, artificial sweetener-laden aftertaste—quite enough to turn me off.

KICK (INTENSITY)—10+

Redline’s one of those drinks that I knew of well before I started reviewing energy drinks—in just about every circle in which energy drinks would be consumed, it’s reputation for singular potency precedes it.

Reading the proprietary blend listed on the back/side, I can believe it.  There are a number of ingredients in this drink that I haven’t seen in others, including an extract of the herb yohimbe, which is betimes employed in botanical circles as a treatment for erectile dysfunction.  A conversation I don’t particularly want to have:

ACQUAINTENCE: So, how’d that Redline work for ya?

ME:  IT GAVE ME ERECTIONS!!!

Anyway, recommended serving’s four ounces—so half the bottle.  I started off with that, and got a pretty decent buzz.  Then I decided, “You know what?  I think I could handle more.”  So…I went ahead and took down the rest of it, which turned out to be a mistake.  Redline’s a creeper—the effects aren’t immediately obvious, but build over the course of a half hour or so.  Once that time frame passed, I was left with a kick that was legitimately insane—I was bounding from task to task, wrapping up projects in about half the normal time just because it was so dang uncomfortable to sit still.

Trust me on this—four ounces will do you just fine.

KICK (DURATION)—10+

So…as though it weren’t enough that it was so dang strong, the effects of the full bottle kept me going for about ten hours.  Yeah, you read right—ten hours of insane energy.  What on earth does anybody need to go that strong for that long for?  Unless you’re creating the heavens and the earth, I’ll say it once again­­—half a bottle will work just fine.

THE DRINK OVERALL—9.33

If you’re going to drink Redline, go ahead—but drink half the bottle.  I will be reviewing Redline beverages based on what the recommended serving delivers—because drinking the full eight ounces is just nuts.

WEBSITE: http://www.vpxsports.com/sports-nutrition/fat-loss-energy-supplements

KEYWORDS: Redline Xtreme Lime energy drink review, extreme energy, low calorie, zero calorie, sugar free