Recently,
I began reviewing energy shots. My
first shot experience (Monster Hitman) left me feeling singularly underwhelmed,
but it instilled within me a resolve to find a truly great energy shot—one that
would confirm to me that my decision to review shots would be worth it. Seeing as 5 Hour Energy is considered
the “original,” I figured it would be a good next stop in my search.
CAFFEINE
CONTENT
207 mg
EASE
IN ACQUISITION—10
You
can get this and most other 5 Hour Energy shots most anywhere you look.
APPEARANCE/PRESENTATION—7
The
look of the shot itself is intriguing—I’m a runner, and I quite like the idea
of an energy product that will help me bound over mountains during sunset. That aside, I also hate shrink wrap—so
I have a love-hate kind of thing going on with this bottle.
TASTE—.5
I’ve
been told that the original (i.e. berry) 5 Hour Energy is kind of the Red Bull
of shots—it’s the one that everyone copies so as to get a piece of 5 Hour
Energy’s demographic. This is
something I have a hard time believing, as I can’t for the life of me fathom
why anyone would want to regularly drink this swill.
I
can count on one hand the number of times I’ve had something so badly
executed. There is absolutely nothing about this shot that actually
works. Let’s go over it
bit-by-bit, so you get the idea.
First is the flavor itself—you can’t actually taste the alleged berry
flavor. There is a sickening
sourness that that dominates from the start, and overwhelms any nuance of berry
that might be in there. Second is
the aftertaste—it is really horrifically
bitter. I understand that it’s
probably harder to mask the taste of the energy components in something this
small, but if Monster can do it, so can 5 Hour Energy. Lastly is the sweetener blend—it’s
really bad. It’s not even a good
kind of sweet that would provide some respite from the rest of the experience;
it just adds its own brand of terrible to the mix.
I
reviewed 250+ energy drinks before adding shots to the repertoire, and let me
tell you—I’ve had bad 16 oz. energy
drinks that were easier to get down than 2 ounces of this stuff. I kept taking small swigs, then holding
it in there, because I couldn’t decide what was worse—swallowing it and thus
putting it into my body, or
perpetually tasting it. As though all that wasn’t enough, once
I finally decided to do the former, the stuff hit my stomach like a
sledgehammer—two hours later and still in the throes of the shot's effects (see
the next two sections), and I still have indigestion.
The
only thing good I can say about the flavor is that it does not sink to the
fiendish depths of the 12 oz. Rockstar 2X. But when that’s all
that can be said in favor of your shot, you really need to rethink what you’re
doing with your life.
KICK
(INTENSITY)—9
You
want energy? This will at least
give you energy—assuming you can manage to choke it down. I’d call the boost substantial, though
jitter-free.
KICK
(DURATION)—10
Lives
up to its name—five hours with a light to moderate crash.
THE
SHOT OVERALL—6.5
Does
it work? Yes. Is if worth it? Not by a long shot (rimshot). 5 Hour Energy Extra Strength—Berry is
some seriously nasty stuff. Spare yourself—get
your energy through something drinkable.
WEBSITE:
5hourenergy.com
KEYWORDS:
5 Hour Energy Extra Strength Berry review, 5 Hour Energy shot review, zero
calorie, zero carb
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